Dearest Suzie

Finding My Grief | Full Piece

February 10th, 2025  |  32 mins 1 sec

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this special compilation episode of Dearest Suzie, we present the full Finding My Grief series—an intimate exploration of loss, memory, and connection to my grandfather. Across these episodes, I reflect on what it means to inherit a loved one’s things, to uncover pieces of their past, and to navigate the complex emotions that come with preserving their story.

Through the things in my grandparent's trailer, we witness not just the realities of war but also the deeply personal struggles of distance, longing, and responsibility. As I piece together his experiences, I also confront my own grief—learning how history, family, and personal loss intertwine.

Episode 045: 1965-02-09 | Finding My Grief, Finale

February 9th, 2025  |  8 mins 58 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill writes home about the latest attacks in Vietnam, including a strike on Soc Trang and an outpost dangerously close to his own base. His letter reveals the growing tension among the men—watching the firefight from their helicopters, waiting for their turn to be hit. He speaks of fear, exhaustion, and frustration, but also of love—sending thoughts of home, responding to Suzie’s requests, and pushing back against the idea that they need anything more in common than their family.

This episode also concludes Finding My Grief, a deeply personal reflection on loss, memory, and coming to understand the complexities of Popi’s life. Through stories shared by Mema and the objects left behind, the journey of reckoning with grief comes full circle, offering closure and a path toward healing.

Episode 044: 1965-02-07 | Panic From Pleiku

February 7th, 2025  |  6 mins 27 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill Lowie writes home with the weight of war on his shoulders. The Viet Cong attack on Pleiku has shaken his unit, leaving them anxiously waiting for casualty reports and wondering if they’ll be next. His words—“It is hopeless”—capture the frustration and exhaustion of soldiers caught in an escalating conflict.

Accompanied by a photo of Charlie, the mischievous base mascot, today’s episode explores the impact of the Pleiku attack, the growing sense of futility among troops, and the small comforts that kept them going.

Episode 043: 1965-02-06 | Finding My Grief Pt. 6

February 6th, 2025  |  8 mins 26 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Popi writes to Suzie about financial concerns, a possible trip to Bangkok, and his efforts to send money home despite unexpected expenses. He reassures her that they are managing and reminds her not to stress about savings while they are apart. His letter, unfinished due to a missing page, leaves lingering questions about his thoughts in that moment.

Accompanied by a photo from Hawaii, today’s episode explores not only Popi’s plans but also reflections on his return from war, his struggles with vulnerability, and the impact of his service on his family.

Episode 042: 1965-02-05 | Finding My Grief Pt. 5

February 5th, 2025  |  9 mins 41 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill sends a short letter home, enclosing their income tax return and expressing how much he misses his family. Meanwhile, the next part of Finding My Grief delves into the ways Popi treated each of his sons differently—and how those differences shaped their lives.

Accompanied by a striking aerial photo of Bien Hoa after a Viet Cong attack, today’s episode explores family dynamics, resilience, and the lasting effects of parental expectations.

Episode 041: 1965-02-04 | Finding My Grief Pt. 4

February 4th, 2025  |  7 mins 37 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill Lowie writes home during a rare lull in missions due to the unofficial truce for the Vietnamese New Year. He shares updates about his instrument flight renewal, receiving his first air medal, and his anticipation of transitioning to the armed platoon. His letters reflect both exhaustion and the relentless passage of time as he counts down the days until his return home.

Accompanied by a photograph of American soldiers standing at ease in the Boulevard of the State Flags in Vinh Long—possibly an award ceremony—today’s episode also continues Finding My Grief, exploring Popi’s early years, his decision to join the Army, and Mema’s stories of their life together.

All Episodes, January 1965

February 1st, 2025  |  1 hr 11 mins

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this special episode of Dearest Suzie, we reflect on the January 1965 letters from Bill Lowie, capturing a month filled with uncertainty, hardship, and resilience. From financial struggles and missed holidays to heightened alerts and the looming threat of attacks, Bill’s words reveal the stark realities of war.

As tensions escalate , Bill navigates life on continuous standby. Amidst the stress, his letters remain filled with love—promising gifts for Suzie and the boys, finding small ways to stay connected despite the distance.

Episode 040: 1965-01-31 | Finding My Grief Pt. 3

January 31st, 2025  |  7 mins 57 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill writes home about receiving another letter from Suzie, buying a slide projector, and arranging for a sapphire to be sent home. He also looks ahead to a possible promotion and reflects on missing his family.

Accompanied by a photo of a figure walking through a rice paddy, today’s episode continues the Finding My Grief series, exploring family legacies, lost connections, and the echoes of past generations.

Episode 039: 1965-01-29 | A Week Under Fire

January 29th, 2025  |  7 mins 26 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Popi writes a deeply emotional letter to Suzie on January 29, 1965, during a rare platoon party. He reflects on the challenges of the week, including the loss of a Christmas package, the camaraderie of his platoon, and the devastating realities of war. Popi recounts being under enemy fire 37 times in just seven days and shares a harrowing story of evacuating wounded civilians, including a young woman and her baby—a moment that profoundly affected him.

Accompanied by a photo of a mother and her baby at the Bangkok Zoo, today’s episode explores the toll of war on Popi's spirit and the weight of his love for his family, which made the suffering he witnessed all the more unbearable.

Episode 038: 1965-01-25 | Roast Beef Out The Ears

January 25th, 2025  |  8 mins 45 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, we explore a letter from January 25, 1965, in which Bill Lowie details his financial juggling and shares vivid, often humorous accounts of his dining experiences at the officer’s club in Vietnam. From planning thoughtful gifts for family members to navigating the costs of club dues, meals, and Christmas bills, Bill’s letter reveals the personal and logistical challenges of life overseas.

Accompanied by a photo featuring the interior of an officer’s club—complete with colorful chairs, a bar, and slot machines—today’s episode offers a glimpse into the daily realities of military life, blending the mundane with the sentimental.

Episode 037: 1965-01-23 | Finding My Grief Pt. 2

January 23rd, 2025  |  8 mins 2 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, we continue with Part 2 of Finding My Grief and hear Bill Lowie’s reflections on family, connection, and the quieter moments of war. His letter to Suzie, dated January 23, 1965, offers a glimpse into his life at the time—filled with letters from home, quiet troop lifts, and cautious optimism about upcoming R&R plans.

Accompanied by an aerial shot showing buildings on fire, today’s episode bridges the realities of war with reflections on family and loss.

Episode 036: 1965-01-22 | Finding My Grief Pt. 1

January 22nd, 2025  |  8 mins 49 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, we dive into a heartfelt exploration of grief, beginning with a letter from Bill Lowie dated January 22, 1965. Bill writes to Suzie with a heavy heart, longing for her letters and sharing the latest from Vietnam, including harrowing accounts of helicopter accidents and gunship incidents.

Accompanied by a deeply personal piece of creative nonfiction titled "Finding My Grief Part 1," this episode reflects on loss, anger, and the enduring impact of family connections. The story recounts a poignant moment in my life when grief and frustration collided, beginning to shape my understanding of love and memory.

Episode 035: 1965-01-18 | The Bob Hope Search

January 18th, 2025  |  6 mins 17 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill Lowie’s letter from January 18, 1965, touches on the joys and frustrations of mail delivery in Vietnam, the quiet tension of recent troop lifts, and his fondness for family photos. He reflects on a fruitcake from home, the boys’ pictures, and his gratitude for regular letters from his wife.

The episode also follows the resolution of the Bob Hope Christmas Special mystery: Was Bill featured in the broadcast? After an investigative journey through YouTube, eBay, and old DVDs, the answer proves elusive—but the process highlights the joy of discovery and preserving family history.

Accompanied by a photo from a USO show, depicting musicians performing for the troops, today’s episode offers a glimpse into both the personal and communal moments that sustained soldiers far from home.

Episode 034: 1965-01-16 | Capturing the Moment

January 16th, 2025  |  7 mins 26 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, Bill Lowie reflects on receiving letters from home, his thoughts on family trips, and the daily grind of his work in Vietnam. Amid the letter’s warmth and pragmatism, we delve into the art of photography, exploring how Popi captured moments in a warzone with his 35mm film camera—preserving history one frame at a time.

Accompanied by a blurry, dreamlike photo of Charlie sitting on the ground and eating, today’s episode highlights the beauty of film photography and its role in Popi’s legacy.

Episode 033: 1965-01-14 | The Reluctant Instructor

January 14th, 2025  |  5 mins 35 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, we explore a letter where Popi reflects on his first experience as an instructor pilot and his anticipation of reaching the halfway point in his tour. As he trains new pilots by day and prepares for troop lift missions by night, we get a glimpse of his dedication and quiet humility.

Accompanied by a photo of a soldier standing in front of wooden barracks, today’s episode provides a grounded look at the daily realities of life in Vietnam—homes away from home for so many soldiers.

Episode 032: 1965-01-12 | Popi's Promotion

January 12th, 2025  |  6 mins 10 secs

1960s war correspondence, army, army history, arvn, asia, aviation, aviation history, bangkok, civil war, family history podcast, grandfather’s vietnam war letters, helicopter pilot, helicopter pilot war stories, huey, legacy of vietnam veterans, letters from vietnam, military, military history, military history podcast, personal vietnam war archive, pleiku, saigon, vc, veteran stories, viet cong, vietnam veteran memoirs, vietnam war, vietnam war diary, vietnam war letters, vietnam war oral history, vietnam war personal accounts, vietnam war photo archive, vinh long, war, war correspondence

In this episode of Dearest Suzie, we explore Popi’s letter from January 12, 1965, where he shares the news of becoming an instructor pilot, the challenges of limited communication with home, and his surprising efforts to bring Charlie, a monkey he owned, back to the United States.

Accompanied by a photograph of a low-flying helicopter carrying smiling soldiers, today’s episode reflects on the small joys, mounting frustrations, and unique relationships that sustained service members far from home.